Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
