I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
When are your genitals available?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize