do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
