This girl is more easily done than said...
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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