did you get engaged???
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
