im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
