Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
