Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
