Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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