Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize
