thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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