The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
