I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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