Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize