I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
