what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
