Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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