Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
