Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
