I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
