Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
