some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
