You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
