Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
