what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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