I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Randomize
