Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i jhust puked up my retainher.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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