ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
