he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize