It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
pray to the hookup gods
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Will exercising make me less horny?
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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