I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Randomize