There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
