i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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