she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
