I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Just high enough for therapy.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
