They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
