It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
