i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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