I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
