just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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