in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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