Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize