Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize