my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
