OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
