i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
