How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
