i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
