she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
