We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
